if i was eight and missing you missing me too

i always loved to write but i never really could but i do and you say i should

 

and you say i should sing a song that i can’t sing but i will because you hear more than sound

 

and you say you love everyone ive ever loved or love or who loves me because love loves wholly

 

and i open my arms to your entirety because that entirety made you you

entirely

 

and i live and die with your deaths and resurrections because i feel like i’ve been birthed or buried

 

and i know when you are far away because i am far away and afraid of the end of our eternity

 

and life has bigger things to see to than two stars who

look like

 

oneshininglight

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In One Second

I am waiting for forever to roll around

The Cardinals looking for shadows beneath clouds

 

Thunder starting low and miles away trying to catch up to light

 

Robins with red hearts beating in the dead veins of winter

 

The maple storing green rain to grow and branch into a million trees

 

Coffee going cold in my hand and the Crow on the power line laughing

 

 

Lakeshore Park in January

This first month of the year sits on the park bench like a boulder holding down a flower.

 

It watches me reach for life up through the Oak’s heavy arms.  Nothing but arms weighted down from being strong and they are gray with exhaustion.  No Crow,  no secret, no leaf to fall or rustle against a whisper.  Only the arms reaching down for me through the month’s dead mouth.

 

The Heron glides in with a blue that makes the gray beautiful and breaks the month’s spine,  vertebrate cracking and hushed as stone rolling off of flowers.  Something moves in the arms of the Oak and I lean my head against her chest to hear her breathe again.

River Crossing

All the stones are slippery every

single one holds no foot steady no

gait straight forward or tall no one erect

 

the wilderness perhaps is our feet

sliding out from beneath our

trunks flailing against all the odds flailing against loss

 

leaves flying in the wind scattered

above water’s reflection with

nothing to cling to nothing to see no one to see them fall